About Elizabeth Turner
On 11 September 2001, my husband, Simon, died on the 106th Floor of the World Trade Centre, New York. I was 7 months pregnant at the time, expecting our first child, and William was born in November 2001. Eighteen months later my mum died of a degenerative illness, Multiple Systems Atrophy, related to Parkinson’s disease.
I now found myself in a place where my normal had gone and I had to completely rebuild my life from scratch – I had changed, my life had changed and I had to create a new future and a positive way forward.
Elizabeth talks about her experience during an interview for "Outlook", recorded 10th Sept '09 for the BBC World Service
The Blue Skies of Autumn is written in memory of my husband Simon. I wanted to do something that reflected the impact his death. I also wanted to write an account of the experience in my own words for my son, William. He of all people deserved to hear the story from me and not a version from the world’s press.
Finally, I wanted to write about the lessons that I had from my journey through grief. I have learnt a lot and I hoped that anyone in the future who found themselves in the midst of a life changing experience may find some comfort, wise words, or some common threads that might help them find their own path through their experience.
My life stopped being normal after Simon died. In fact, I now call it Life 1 and Life 2. Everything changed.
I remember standing in the footprint of the towers at Ground Zero six months after 9/11 and asking myself what I was going to do with my life after all that had happened. What I did know, was that in Life 2, I needed to know that I had made a difference and that Simon’s death had meant something in the world. I needed to leave a positive footprint.
My bench mark is to think of Simon in the World Trade Centre and to ask myself what I hoped for anyone in that moment. I hoped that he could look back on his life and know that it had been the life that he had wanted. Not the one that someone had expected of him, not the one that he had had no control over or the one that he didn’t like. I knew that Simon’s life was where he wanted it to be and I knew that he had created that for himself.
So I promised myself that I would create the life that I wanted to live and I also wanted to help others do the same for themselves. I wanted my work to be a reflection of who I was and how I lived. So I took all the things I loved from Life 1 which was the coaching work that I had done for many years in my HR career and I added all the experiences I had had since 9/11 and I mixed it all together so that I could take it forward as a business in a life affirming way.
I could see that all the skills I had picked up through my life had been great until I came face to face with Simon’s death and then they felt completely useless. My toolbox of life skills was not packed for emergencies and it didn’t take me long to realize that I had to find new skills and tools to help me cope and survive an experience that I had never faced before. I took time to look at my life tools and some I had to throw out, some I had to polish and sharpen and I also had to bring in new ones. Only then could I even begin to face the task of handling Life 2.
Now, I take this experience and I use it in all the work that I do with others. I give talks and coach clients in many areas including career change, divorce, financial issues, bereavement, illness, mid life crises and redundancy to name a few.
I help people to find new tools to help them face new challenges in life and I help them to choose their way through these experiences, so they can create their own path wherever it may take them.
You can find out more about Elizabeth Turner Coaching here>>
